Sacramento offers gang members up to $9,000 not to shoot each other.

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SACRAMENTO CITY COUNCILNearly a hundred years ago, Will Rogers said, “Make crime pay. Become a lawyer.”  But even Will would have been at a loss for words to describe a recent decision by the Sacramento City Council to pay the 50 most well-known, trigger-happy gang members up to $500 a month, for up to 18 months, not to nine each other. Continue reading

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Who’s the looniest city in America? Introducing The MoonPie Award

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First Prize. A dozen Original Marshmallow Sandwiches for you, a dozen for your favorite local politicians.

First Prize. A dozen Original Marshmallow Sandwiches for you, a dozen for your favorite local politicians.

So your city council is going to pass a resolution honoring the 71st birthday of the United Nations,  but is too busy to fix a pothole that broke three axles last month. Continue reading

Ghost of Eva Peron haunts New York City

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New York City's newest policymaker, who received exactly as many votes as I did

New York City’s newest policymaker, who received exactly as many votes as I did.

Quick, name a bitter woman who muscled her way into power by rushing in to fill the moral vacuum created by her husband. No, not Eva Peron, Imelda Marcos, Hillary Clinton, or Michelle Obama; they’re yesterday’s news. Today’s self-appointed dictatorette is Chirlane McCray, the wife of recently inaugurated New York Mayor Bill De Blasio. Continue reading

Rohnert Park planners look at forest, ignore trees

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RP GOALS AND STRATEGIES

The other day, I was donating a box of books to the Rohnert Park Library. Half of them were Lee Child/Jack Reacher novels, which any library is glad to see, and the other half were books by Dick Morris, Sean Hannity, and Mark Levin. To my surprise, no alarms went off when these right-wing volumes crossed the threshold, and the walls remained standing as I left the building. Continue reading

Policy wonks invade your recycling bin

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Or else.

RFID (Radio Frequency Identification) chips are everywhere, mostly being used for good. Since they are only 1/8”  long and cost 15 cents each, these tiny little receivers can be sewn into your shirt tail to guarantee your dry cleaner never loses another Facconable. They can be inserted into your cat, so you can learn exactly where Fluffy got flattened by an Escalade. In some circles, this is called closure.

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The Weenie Police

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Be the first in your gym to make a political statement that’s noticed outside the shower.

In San Francisco, there’s a ballot proposal that comes from so far out of left field that even Anthony Weiner wouldn’t support it. In fact, judging from recent photographs, the Big Dog might be one of its most vocal opponents if he didn’t otherwise have his hands full. Continue reading

The Nanny State: Coming to a driveway near you

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My driveway rocks.

It started with the rocks.

After living in San Francisco for 20 years, and putting up with 20 summers of bone-chilling fog, my wife and I decided to move 50 miles north, where we had bought a small piece of undeveloped land in Sonoma County, and piece by piece, built a horse farm on top of an old silage field. Continue reading